Ping. Ping. Ping. Ping. Ping. Ping. Ping. And that is how I woke up my first day of “homeschooling” to discover I was part of a new g-chat, “Sixth grade girls and Mrs. Dimock.” Not even 8 am and I am flooded with messages of “hi” and cat emojis. Jesus, Mary, and Joseph. Seriously kids. You must chill.
A few days later I can now appreciate that I am being included. It means these girls see me as a part of their community, their lives. I know for a fact that if g-chat existed back in 1992, I definitely would not have been in the group. So many harsh memories of middle school that sent the message I was “other” or “less than.” Again, part of why I teach middle school is to make it better for other kids.
Back to Monday. My own children are buzzing. My phone is pinging off the hook, my email is flooded. I’ve barely slept due to stress. Must. have. coffee. All the coffee. I collect the kids and we head to school. My partner, Austin, and I are hosting a “Zoom Party” to check in with the kids and make sure everyone knows how to get onto the platform. Seeing all of this little faces fills me with joy. Knowing I won’t be with them for weeks, if not months, there are so many emotions.
Thanks to my test session with my own kids, I have the students practice how to “raise their hands” and go into breakout rooms for small group work and discussion. The kids are so respectful and listen. They quickly teach each other. A side panel pops up where students can send me questions. Austin and I are able to clearly explain expectations and what we know will be happening for now. Different staff pop into our room to watch and wave at the kids.
We say good-bye and end the meeting. I’ve barely crossed the hall and a group of kids is video chatting me, asking for help with math. They quickly invite the rest of the math class to join. I find myself explaining slope without any of my math materials. It goes fine, but oh, this is crazy. I’m try to get out of the building as quickly as possible but there are still loose ends to wrap up.
The sudden shut down of school has left me feeling rattled. It’s about an hour and a half past when I should have taken my pill. I’m shaking. I just need to get home. The idea of making lunch is too much so we hit the Starbucks drive-thru. I’m way too nice and let the kids get food AND a drink.
At home, I take my pill. I try to lie down, but I can’t stop shaking. My inbox continues to be flooded. Somehow I manage to help my kids get their schoolwork done. I then realize I’m supposed to be at the chiropractor in 10 minutes. We fly out the door. Aftewards, Linus makes a compelling argument for Menchi’s. It’s sunny and it will probably close soon. Currently, all restaurants are shut down except for take out. And that is the story of how my kids got frozen yogurt for dinner.
Day 2. It’s a little less crazy. Dave is now working from home too so there is less pressure on me. We’ve instituted rules. No personal screen time until after 6 pm and you must have done a job, brushed your teeth (the kids now already live in pajamas), completed schoolwork, and tried dinner.
The morning is quiet. Peaceful. It’s weird. I don’t question it because I need to teach and work. I find myself in zoom sessions with groups of kids. At 1 pm, I institute “Mom’s film appreciation.” 1 pm happens to be when I’m holding office hours. During Mom’s Film Appreciation, Mom chooses a movie she thinks they need to watch for cultural/pop cultural reasons. The bulk of these will come from Disney Plus. These kids have never seen the Sound of Music and they’ve got nothing but time! The beauty of Mom’s Film Appreciation class is that attendance is optional. However, you cannot opt for other types of screens.
Day 3. It continues to get a little calmer in terms of my email inbox and anxious students. In a way, I feel like I’m getting to know some of my students better. It’s still quiet at the house. Mom’s film appreciation class continues to work. Robin dislikes the whole school thing and tries to recycle his work. He protests by reading every picture book in the house and putting them in a pile as he finishes. Okay little man. You do you.
Switching to digital teaching is now a whole different level of crazy. There is just so much to manage. I have work to do that I haven’t even touched. My body responds with tremors. Additional stressors with my extended family send everything into overdrive. Both hands shake, even lying down, I shake. My head jerks, I do my chimpanzee face. This is not cool.
I need to get to calm. Clean and organized spaces make me feel at peace. The house is feeling very “lived in.” Normally, we have cleaners come every two weeks. This is now not happening.
I devise a plan. I place everyone’s favorite order at Dick’s Drive-In. The food will be here in 30 minutes. Okay guys. Everyone is getting a room and we are cleaning. No work. No burger and shake.
“But I don’t know how to vacuum.”
Time to learn kid.
Everyone works at a fevered pace. We get almost everything done. Oh it feels so good. And never has a burger and strawberry shake tasted sooooo good.
I take a shower because I smell like bleach. Clean, satiated, and shaking, I’m done. I can teach or email nor more today.